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| (All pics from my Bookstagram) |
It's because I hate change. Anyone who knows me knows that change is my least-favorite thing. Changed plans stress me out more than anything else. People who change make me sad. Graduations and weddings and funerals make me cry. Change bothers me. Sometimes deeply.
And, you know what I realized today? Hamlet hates change too.
In fact, he spends the first four acts of the play raging against change.
Everything in his life has changed. His father has changed from alive to dead. And then his dead father changes into a ghost. His mother changes from loving wife of his father to loving wife of his uncle. His uncle changes from some random dude at court into the king AND Hamlet's stepfather. His ability to woo and court Ophelia changes from being totally fine to totally forbidden.
And Hamlet's whole life plan changes from "I'm happy at college, and some day I'll probably be king" to "I'm not permitted to go back to college, and I probably won't ever be king" to "I need to avenge my father by killing my uncle, so now I'm definitely never going to live long enough to go back to college, much less be king."
And he hates it. He rages against it. He refuses to accept the inevitability of change. Claudius and Gertrude try to remind him in the very beginning of the play that death is inevitable, and Hamlet is not having it. He refuses to accept that. He nopes right on out of there, as fast as his inky cloak will let him. No, no, no, change and death are not inevitable, you can just take that idea and shove it where the sun don't shine.
And then, while he's off hanging out with pirates between acts 4 and 5, Hamlet changes. He accepts the inevitability of change and of death. He comes back to Denmark, and he's ready for whatever is next.
And THAT is what I am drawn to, when my life is in upheaval. That journey of Hamlet's from raging against the inevitability of change to accepting it is exactly the journey I need to take myself, every time I move somewhere new or take on a new job or face some really stressful situation. I've always said Hamlet is cathartic for me, and that watching or reading it kind of cleanses me emotionally. And I was never quite sure how else to explain that, but now I know. I'm processing my own hatred of change by sharing Hamlet's, and his journey eases me along in my own.
So. Now I know. And now you do too.
That's all I've got for today. Carry on about your business.
Fascinating stuff!
ReplyDeleteAlso, the line "he nopes right out on of there, as fast as his inky cloak will let him" gave me great pleasure :D
Katie, this kind of thing always interest me, so I'm glad it interested you too!
DeleteAnd hee, that line was fun to write :-D
Makes sense to me!
ReplyDeleteAlso, wouldn't it be so cool to know what all Hamlet and the pirates got up to?
Eva, you never know, I still might write Thieves of Mercy some day, in which the pirates from Hamlet are the same ones that Shakespeare also has randomly pop up in other plays to solve plot holes...
DeletePLEASE write this. I need it.
DeleteKatie, well, it's sort of somewhere in the future pipeline, how's that?
DeleteThis is so interesting, how different people react to change, and how/why different people read and like books. You seem to like books that mirror you, I guess you were saying?
ReplyDeleteI need to escape into books, I DON'T want to see too much reflected in the book.
I'm sort of ambivalent/split about change. I need variety and I do want change sometimes (to a limited extent), but I fear it or I fear so much involved in it. So I think I come across more as someone who doesn't like change at all.
Livia, aren't people fascinating?
DeleteI don't tend to seek out stories that mirror me. The same thing makes me love a book or be indifferent to it as makes me love or be indifferent to a movie: whether or not I want to be friends with the characters and hang out with them. If I do, I will be a fan, and I can overlook a lot of flaws and still enjoy the story for the characters. If I don't, I can objectively see good points in the book or movie, but it just won't be one I love. (And it's not like I do this consciously, it's just something I'll realize after I've finished a book or movie and loved or not loved it -- I'll look back and go, "Well, of course, it's because of how I connected to the characters, or didn't...")
When reading a book or watching a movie for the first time, I'm definitely just all about being sucked in. It's only upon further reflection after I've finished it that I'll look deeper, if it's a story worthy of contemplating. This is part of why rereads and rewatches are so enjoyable for me -- they not only let me re-experience a story I like and hang out with characters I want to be friends with, but they give me a chance to study the storytelling.
I think it's change that I am not expecting or that I don't want to happen that bothers me the most. When I can think about something a while and decide to change it, that's fine.
Maybe it's also self-soothing. Hamlet never changes. It's always going to be the same, so it's your stable rock in the midst of the chaos of uncontrolled outer life.
ReplyDeleteI am apprehensive about change if I don't know what's on the other side of it. I don't like change that is bad. I can't say I'm a huge fan of the social changes of the last 20 years, or the post-pandemic changes that are horrific (riots, poor work ethic, racial tensions, hatred, and an economy in the toilet), but I pretty much changed up my entire house and front yard this summer and I LOVE it.
Charity, I definitely rewatch and reread more any time I am stressed. Not Hamlet only, but many dear favorites. However, it's the one story I am consistently drawn to during times of upheaval in my life. Like, it's always in that mix of things I crave. But I reread and watch different versions at random times too. No huge changes going on in my life right now at all, but I've read it twice this spring and summer, and read two retellings of it. Just because I love it.
DeleteI definitely don't like changes for the worse, and the spiral our society is in is very scary. I don't like changes I am not expecting, or ones I can see will obviously cause trouble. But good changes, and changes that I am either warned about and can get used to ahead of time are fine. I rarely change the decorations in my house, for instance, but once in a while I'll find something new that I really like, and then I'll enjoy trying to figure out what it should replace.
I love this. Learning what makes people's favorite stories their favorite is . . . well, my favorite.
ReplyDeleteI don't think I'd ever thought much about the theme of change in Hamlet, but the way you explained it -- and the way it influences your experience of the story and the character -- makes so much sense. Fascinating!
Thank you, Olivia!
DeleteI have thought about this a LOT, as you might imagine, and finally really and truly knowing a big part of WHY I love Hamlet so much is... pretty satisfying, I must say.