"Dear Annie: I am a 35-year-old woman with four children, an advanced degree and no serious health problems, but I have compulsively and secretly been eating crayons for months."Isn't that hilarious? I mean, honestly...the way she starts out by reciting her normalcy...I figured it would be another of those "I'm attracted to the high school kid who mows my lawn" or "I think I'm fat but my husband keeps forcefeeding me cookie dough" problems. No, no, the woman is eating crayons. Eating them "compulsively and secretly". The wording could not be more perfect! It's exactly how they tell you to write unexpectedish humor! I love it!
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Here is the absolute funniest opening sentence I have read in a really long time. Especially since it comes from a non-humor-oriented place...it's a letter to one of those multitudinous advice columns the Wisconsin State Journal runs (from Monday, Feb 7, 2005 to be precise). I don't mean to mock the poor woman who wrote it, because she obviously has a legitimate problem. But the way she sets up her tale of woe just makes me giggle. In fact, I laughed out loud in the break room at work when I first read it: